FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

"I’ll put you in your grave..."

Sudbury, Ontario — April 30,2004 — She sat in my office silent and withdrawn. Baring the scars of past beatings and the bright purple bruises from the night before . Her youngest child sitting on her lap appeared tired and frightened. I asked myself, had she finally found the courage to leave last night or was it beaten into her? As we spoke of her situation, she described to me how she was certain that this time his threats were real. Her young son piped up; "My Daddy said he would put my Mommy in her grave ... then he kept hitting her and hitting her. She was crying a lot..."

Domestic violence is one of the greatest dangers to a woman's life in Canada; 1 out of every 4 women will fall victim to some form of violence by their intimate partner or someone they know by the age of 25. Every day of the year, women of all ages, women from all backgrounds, women are murdered or beaten by their partners.

It is shameful that the Greater City of Sudbury Council and its members find it fitting to honor women that have lost their lives to violence by recognizing it through a monument within a "graveyard". It is further shameful that a Coalition created to "End violence against women" accepts the graveyard as a final resting place for a monument that was intended to honor the very women they serve.

A monument placed in a graveyard is not a reflection of honor or an effective tool in the education of the issues surrounding domestic violence. Instead, a monument placed in a graveyard is an insult to the those women who are searching to find the courage to leave violent relationships in order to affect a positive change in their and their children’s lives.

The Greater City of Sudbury Council needs to take responsibility in their decision to continue to place the issue of Domestic Violence out of sight. It is unfortunate that the Coalition to End Violence Against women have swayed so far from their initial passion to have settled for a "plot" instead of a park..

I am pleading with my sisters to stand up and no longer be silent, to hold accountable the decision makers, who further victimize women by their misdirected deeds. This threat is real... they have approved the graveyard for your honor, be silent no more. Make your voice heard...

Barbara Garon Investing in Women’s Future Coordinator
Rose Menard Executive Director
Executive Board of Directors of the Sudbury Women’s Centre des Femmes

For more information contact:
Barbara Anne Garon
Investing in Women’s Futures - Coordinator
(705) 673-1916
Email: ncp@cyberbeach.net

Sudbury Women’s Centre des Femmes
324 Elm Street West, Suite F
Sudbury, Ontario P3C 1V8

Subj: Women's Monument - information package
Date: 5/12/04 9:07:02 PM Eastern Daylight Time
From: larryweissmann
To: cvf@on.aibn.com
CC: david.courtemanche@city.greatersudbury.on.ca
CC: rbartolucci.mpp.co@liberal.ola.org

Dear Mr. Pharand,

I am in receipt today of the information package you were gracious enough to send, about the Coalition's monument to women - it certainly sheds further light on the issue. But if I was pained before, it's hard to set in words my feelings, on seeing that people can as casually wipe out any claim to a need for social responsibility, as I find in its contents.

Before going to the main point, there are a few "technicalities" about the package that cannot be neglected. I'm glad to see that you provide one page out of the four with at least statistics on domestic violence, but note as well that it's little more than just that - statistics. At the same time, one of the other pages is given over completely to the monument itself, including a full paragraph which is no less than an open and unashamed commercial advertisement for its designer. I can have no quarrel with Mr. Ellero receiving mention - presumably the work is being done with little or no cost involved, as a contribution to this "reminder" of domestic violence. At least I hope that's the case, despite the fact not being stated unambiguously.

But to find in the promo materials for monument and your coalition - which claims its basis to be those of "Respect, Serenity, Peace" - such a crass advertisement, which ends on the note "All authentic Ellero creations are hand carved in Sudbury," is a travesty that leaves one astounded by its callousness. Is this the way the victims are offered respect - by using them to enhance the commercial prospects of a local businessman? Is this the way they are offered serenity - through the knowledge that their memory is being used to promote and increase the coffers of the Sudbury business community? Are they to rest peacefully, in the happy thought that they are contributing to the
designer's well-being? And to top it all off, here is the advertisement, here the bare statistics, with a third page given over to listing all the members of the coalition, but nowhere the page there should be - the one telling me, in tribute to their sacrifice, the names of every one of the more than 60 Sudbury victims you allude to, but allude to in statistical form only!

I also can't avoid noticing that at the bottom of every page in the package is a footer stating that the same Respect, Serenity, and Peace, are "key values in creating a safe future for our community." And yet, both symbolically and tangibly, the monument's placement in a cemetery says that those very same community key values deserve no more than being in a place of burial.

And now to my main concern - Point 7 of your factual information page, which reads "Perpetrators of woman abuse are solely responsible for the violence and must be held accountable for their actions."

Conscience, I acknowledge, is at times a terrifying thing, and there are probably few people alive who would wish more than I do that it were possible to avoid dealing with it. And yet conscience, a sense of our communal responsibility towards the world, is the one thing, the only thing, that ever has offered hope for our lives as a species and as individuals. To make the claim made in your pages, to so baldly seek to avoid the fact that each and all of us
must bear at least an awareness of our own responsibility for that violence, negates every one of the values the coalition elsewhere claims to promote.

Reading the information you sent, I feel only an increased hurting, in the clear knowledge that the planned monument will do, can do, nothing towards dealing with the problem of violence. Feel also, a raised awareness of how terrible indeed is the struggle of women in this society. And, too, a special sadness for you as well as the other members and of the coalition, who have chosen (only temporarily, I hope) to bury your own best humanity behind a masque of expediency.

Yours with prayers for a better world,
Larry Weissmann

Friday, May 14, 2004

To: Gaëtane Pharand - co-chair Sudbury Coalition to End Violence Against Women)

I am writing to you to request an information folder regarding the placement of the memorial to be erected in memory of the slain women of Sudbury in a Sudbury Cemetery. I want to try and understand the decision you have made
regarding the location of the monument.

Of course, you and the coalition have put a great deal of effort and energy into this project to recognize the slain women of Sudbury and I commend you and the committee for your efforts.

Nevertheless, there is an issue of great concern in your plans. First, a monument in a cemetery seems a snide or cruel remembrance to women whose lives were unfairly, abruptly and violently brought to a close such that there only bit of space in the material world is already a cemetery. It would seem more respectful to recognize them in the public places from which they were exiled by an untimely death.

Secondly, the maxim of "peace, respect and serenity" seems a rather tepid or wishy washy response in the face of such violence. Imagine this were a hockey game and some player was crosschecked into the boards. We would laugh if his response was "I want peace and serenity." He would demand respect and it would be a public demand made loud and clear. If it were otherwise, we know that his worth to his team would go down considerably. He wants justice and so, too do the slain women of Sudbury.

Justice and respect. These can only be had by public recognition. How else will we achieve that just society if we bury the past and its memories in the cemetery along with the women?

We need to make a noise, raise a flag, speak loudly and clearly our determination to preserve the lives of women. I see the Sudbury monument as a huge opportunity to raise the awareness in Sudbury of the plight not only of these slain women, but of the women in Sudbury who continue to endure violence and abuse from their partners, their husbands, and their children.

BUT even more important the women of Sudbury must be recognized and valued by their community. This is the ultimate purpose of such monuments and that is why we see them so often throughout the little hamlets and towns of
Ontario in public parks, in front of City Hall and public buildings.

In my own little town of Streetsville, Ontario, we have such a monument erected on Main Street. It is at the heart of the town, where people stroll of a summer's evening and stop to read the names that are written there and to applaud their sacrifice.

Yes, it is true that they were soldiers slain in battle. So, too were the women of Sudbury slain in a battle of huge proportions.

I ask you and your group to reconsider your decision in the face of its inappropriate designation of a memorial worthy of these women, the slain solders of Sudbury.

Gail McCabe, SSW MA
Academic Advisor
Calumet College
Course Director, Sociology
Glendon College
York University
4700 Keele St. M3J 1P3
416-736-2100 ext. 22237

May 16, 2004

Sent: Sunday, May 16, 2004 6:59 AM
To: rbartolucci.mpp.co@liberal.ola.org
Cc: Lynne.REYNOLDS@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Andre.RIVEST@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Claude.BERTHIAUME@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; doug.craig@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; eldon.gainer@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Janet.Gasparini@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Frances.CALDARELLI@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; ron.bradley@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; ron.dupuis@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; david.courtemanche@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; dawnontario@sympatico.ca; Russ.THOMPSON@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; ted.callaghan@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Terry.KETT@city.greatersudbury.on.ca

Hello Rick;

I am a Registered Nurse and have been working in an Emergency Department in Ontario for many years. Sadly, I have seen a great number of victims of violence in that time. All of them have an aura of hopelessness and being beaten down.

I cannot think of a more inappropriate place to erect a monument of such importance, as it would only reinforce those feelings in terms of possibility of escape or a better life.

A Park where celebrations take place would be a far better choice. Please reconsider this very poor message you are sending to the Women of Sudbury and all Women who visit your city.

If I was to see such a monument is a cemetery, it would scream 'You will end up here anyhow!', however, if I were to spot it at a Park, it would certainly indicate that the politicians care about the Women they represent.

Thank-you
Deborah L. Crosby RN ENC(C)

From: Kim charlebois
To: rbartolucci.mpp.co@liberal.ola.org
Sent: Monday, May 17, 2004 7:09 PM

Mr. Bartolucci,

I was shocked to hear about the plans to erect a monument ("to recognize and honour women killed at the hands of their intimate partner") in a grave yard.

Please listen to the voices of the many people who have responded with outrage, especially those women who have
experienced the violence personally.

Honour these women with the respect they deserve, and put the monument in a public place where all will see it.

Some times even the best intentioned decisions are wrong.

Lets not let this wrong remain a wrong - LETS MAKE IT A RIGHT.

Sincerely,

Kim Charlebois
Executive Director
Sexual Assault Centre for Quinte & District

(Note: What is wrong with this picture? This woman writing below is the E.D. at the Sudbury Sexual Assault Centre. Her pay cheque comes from the Ministry -- where the bulk of members of the Coalition are from that decided to place the women's monument in a graveyard. Connect the dots and it may shed some light on the conspiracy of silence ... seems that whenever you stick to feminist principles you are considered divisive.)


This is the letter from Lynn O'Farrell, Executive Director of Sudbury Sexual Assault Crisis Centre

Friday, May 21, 2004

Ms. Rose Menard, E.D.,
Sudbury Women’s Centre,
324-F Elm Street West,
Sudbury, ON

Dear Rose:

RE: Sudbury Coalition to End Violence Against Women Monument

Having had a chance to read your letter and to reflect on the many opinions expressed in relation to the location of the monument to honour women killed by their intimate partners, I have to say that I feel that concensus on this issue will never be reached and that much energy has been diverted from constructively working together to make a difference in terms of ending violence against women in our community.

After 12 years, I think that it is time to take all of the energy that has been expended thus far and to re-direct it towards the larger issues of how to best support women currently living the “violence” in our community -- this to me is by far the most pressing issue

To be quite honest, I am a bridge-builder and mediator, so my nature is one that weighs all sides of an argument accepting that in many situations there are no right and wrong opinions --that is certainly the case here. It is my hope that we in the violence against women’s sector, can move beyond this controversy to make inroads in addressing this important issue in a collective fashion.

As always, working together towards hope and healing for sexual assault survivors.

Sincerely,

Lynn O’Farrell,
Executive Director
Sudbury Sexual Assault Crisis Centre

Cc Ms. Gaetane Pharand, Executive Director, Centre Victoria pour Femmes
GK (name edited out at individual's request), Sudbury Sexual Assault Crisis Centre
Ms. Colette Prevost, Executive Director, Genevra House

From: Rose Menard
To: Lynn O’Farrell,
Sent: Friday, May 21, 2004 7:32 PM
Subject: Re: Women's Monument

Hi Lynn,

Thanks for the e-mail.

Given, I am very concerned on the "consensus" decision as reached at the Coalition level. I am very aware of the work our agencies do. However, I am dumfounded as how, as a Director of a women's agency and a self-identified survivor, you are able to agree in having this monument located within a graveyard. Could you please explain your rationale behind this, even if just to enlighten me. What message are we giving to the women we work with... that the threats finally came true, but, it's ok to settle for less.

As a feminist agency, I think, "we" in particular need to be allied in understanding the underlying meaning and thought process...for survivors, for those involved in all aspects of abuse. "We" need to give our clients a sense of purpose, of safety... an ideal that "we" as feminist agencies will empower women no matter what...?!? settling for a graveyard is not the meaning I wish to convey... do you??

Lynn, I strongly feel that the three feminist agencies, whose principles are to empower and educate women, the community and the government, need to stand fast on this. I do not want to question the reasoning being your collective decision with the Coalition, but,... and really, have you thought of the consequences of what your agency is portraying to the women of this community and beyond?!? The graveyard is not the place to have a women's monument! Please reconsider! Think of what this "headstone" is saying to women and women's groups everywhere.. the simple perception alone!!! Even Pupatello, within her most recent press release... stated that Sexual Assault can not be hidden...

"TORONTO - Public discussion about sexual violence is an important step in building communities that are safe, strong and livable, said Sandra Pupatello, Minister Responsible for Women's Issues today, in recognizing May as Sexual Assault Prevention Month in Ontario. This year's theme is Sexual Violence-Let's Talk About It!"
Even other Coalition groups, shelters and sexual assault crisis centres are questioning how could these (your) agencies support such a decision?!?

It's not too late!!! Reconsider your collective decision with the location of this monument. Your voice can make a difference!!! Given everything going on, the media etc. the Coalition could take advantage of this opportunity! Delay the unveiling, and continue to lobby City Council for a site deserving of the respect and dignity women deserve; those passed as a result of violence, and particularly, those still living with the fear of dying!

Lynn, this is very wrong... please reconsider your position... I do not want to challenge your decision, but, I feel the entire Coalition "collective" process resulting in the cemetery site is wrong... I have no choice, but, to continue to lobby for the feminist principles in which this agency and I believe in, and, in empowering women, "our clients" to not settle for less, but, to continue to fight those systems that oppress.

Respectfully and In Sisterhood,
Rose

P.S. I've attached just one letter from Jessica Carfagnini, public education coordinator of the Sexual Assault Support Centre of Ottawa and co-chair of the Regional Coordinating Committee to End Violence Against Women for your review!!

To: david.courtemanche@city.greatersudbury.on.ca
Cc: Lynn O'Farrell ; Colette Prevost ; Gaetane Pharand
Sent: Friday, May 21, 2004 1:44 PM
Subject: Women's Monument

The Sudbury Women's Centre des Femmes
324-F, rue Elm St. West/Ouest, Sudbury, ON
Phone (705) 673-1916 Fax (705) 673-7176 Email: swc@isys.ca


Friday, May 21, 2004

Mayor, David Courtemanche,

On behalf of the Sudbury Women’s Centre des Femmes, it is imperative that once again, I bring to you attention, the issue of the pending location of the women’s monument. The Sudbury Women’s Center is greatly opposed to the graveyard location and continues to advocate for an alternate sight. Given the recent community uproar, you must agree, that the location sight must be changed, and, at the very least, the unveiling be put on hold until another suitable sight is located.

Many agencies and individuals are against the cemetery location for such a monument. Having said this, I have also heard responses from council members stating, “This is where the Coalition wanted to put it”. Mr. Courtemanche, please take a moment to fully comprehend the long history and struggles in which this Coalition has had with past Councils in erecting this monument.

As explained within the letter sent to you from the Board of Directors, the SWC, on behalf of the Coalition, had repeatedly approached Council, for the past eights years, with various sight options. Regrettably, (let’s call it politics) these other sights were not secured.

Given, I feel that the Coalition to End Violence Against Women has settled for the cemetery sight simply due to the length of process and that no other sights were offered. As a new progressive mayor, I implore you, to take action in this matter, action that reflects the values in which you represent for this community. Make the right decision in advocating for a suitable location site for this women’s monument; a site reflective of the respect and dignity it deserves.

Regrettably, I acknowledge that the issue of violence will continue, but I will continue to do whatever I can to educate and create a greater awareness on stopping all forms of violence against women and children. I am certain that as mayor you would rather not hear, or twenty years from now, be remembered, as the “progressive” mayor who buried the women’s monument in the cemetery. As we have asked every year for a suitable location for the monument, the legacy of you burying this issue in the graveyard will continue to be at the forefront of any and all Centre discussion, women’s event, social gathering, educational workshop, training session and public event!

Be the progressive mayor that you say you are! Offer the Coalition a monument sight worthy of the respect it deserves or at the very least, suggest that the unveiling of this monument be put on hold until all voices from the community can be heard in a fair and democratic fashion.


Rose Menard, Executive Director
The Sudbury Women’s Centre des Femmes

Cc:
Ms. Gaëtane Pharand, Executive Director, Le Centre Victoria pour femmes/Co- chair of the Sudbury Coalition to End Violence Against Women
Ms. Lynn O’Farrell, Executive Director, Sudbury Sexual Assault Crisis Centre
Ms. Colette Prevost, Executive Director, YWCA / Genevra House
Sudbury Women’s Centre des Femmes, Board of Directors

Monument or Headstone?


Tuesday, May 25, 2004

To: Sudbury Mayor David Courtemanche
Rick Bartolucci, MNDM, MPP - Sudbury
Members of Sudbury City Council
Coalition to End Violence Against Women
The Sudbury Women's Centre
All Women Affected by Domestic Violence


Through the years, I have had the opportunity to have a few platonic relationships with women who were in abusive relationships. I was grateful for any time spent with them because I knew what such an outing might cost them. I still have trouble rationalizing how such seemingly intelligent women could stay in such demeaning relationships.

It is because of these relationships that I must agree with the Sudbury Women's Centre that a graveyard is a most inappropriate place for a Women's Monument.

After each of these meetings, I have silently prayed that the next time I saw these women, it would not be in a graveyard. Please don't put the Monument there. It would not evoke peaceful memories for me - I would be wracked with guilt, wondering what I could have done to prevent them from being there.

With Respect,

L. Dumontelle
Sudbury

May 25, 2004

I protest the placement of the memorial in a graveyard.

Jocelyn (Joyce ) Field
Elliot Lake ON

Wednesday, May 26, 2004
Subject: Re: Monument to Honor Women in Sudbury

Hi Barb

I sent a message two weeks ago to Rick Bartolucci in response to this issue. It's appalling.

I hope you receive enough support to reverse the decision.

In sisterhood

Kim Charlebois
E.D
Sexual Assault Centre
Belleville

Wednesday, May 26, 2004 2:57 PM
Subject: Re: Bury the Monument

Hi Barbara.

I think that we will not be revisiting the smoking bylaw and if we look at store hours it will be under the issue of whether or not to renew certain bylaws so technically it will not be the same issue. I understand though what you are saying.

I have forwarded your email with the website to Caroline Hallsworth and Mark Mieto and by this response am making Council aware that I am still very unhappy with the decision to let the monument be put in the cemetery.

I cannot tell you why there is not the will to try and change this decision. I have made my concerns very clear but only one or two other members of Council seem to share them.

Wish I had something more positive to tell you.

Fran Caldarelli

responding to ....

-----Original Message-----
From: Barbara Garon [mailto:ncp@cyberbeach.net]
Sent: Wednesday, May 26, 2004 5:36 AM
To: Frances.CALDARELLI@city.greatersudbury.on.ca
Cc: Terry.KETT@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; ted.callaghan@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Russ.THOMPSON@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Rose Menard; ron.dupuis@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; ron.bradley@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; rbartolucci.mpp.co@liberal.ola.org; President@ncwc.ca; mccabe; lynne@cyberbeach.net; Lynne.REYNOLDS@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; larryweissmann@aol.com; kathrynlangley@cogeco.ca; Janet Gasparini; info@northernlife.ca; eldon.gainer@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; editorial@thesudburystar.com; doug.craig@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Diane Daigle; david.courtemanche@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; Claude.BERTHIAUME@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; city@thestar.ca; Catherine; barbara@statusofwomen.nt.ca; anello@vianet.ca; Andre.RIVEST@city.greatersudbury.on.ca; am@ctv.ca
Subject: Bury the Monument

Good Morning Frances,

I need you to clarify something for me? Why is it that Council is entertaining revisiting the smoking bylaws as well as the store hours within one calendar year and without a 2/3 majority. Also, can you tell me why it is that this is worthy of a response from Mayor Courtmache...obviously the issue of the "tombstone" to honor women of this community is exactly what this council wants. Please clarify how the rules apply to only specific groups of interest.

Barb Garon
Sudbury Women's Centre des Femmes

Wednesday, May 26, 2004 8:08 AM

I felt I had to write regarding the erection of a monument to honour women who have been murdered by their spouses, in of all the misguided choices...A GRAVEYARD??? Is this some sort of cruel joke? An ironic twist of humanity?

I am in shock and disgusted by City Council's decision to approve this. There is no amount of justification or excuses for this choice. Most people will not visit a gravesite, much less to see a monument. Imagine the horror and heartbreak for the families of those helpless, innocent victims, who may have a loved one taken at the hands of a spouse, buried there??

Why doesn't City Council kick them when they are already down? Especially considering there are women on the City Council, who may or may not be able to identify with this in one form or another. I can't believe that THEY would agree to this. Sudbury has a lot of land and locations that would be logical or sutiable for this monument.

The Coaliton Against Violence Against Women must have been told there was no available locations in the entire District of Sudbury and had to have been forced to even agree to this.

One would think that such a group would vigourously oppose this. The only rationale I can imagine, is that the gravesite location would drive home the point, however it lacks consideration, respect and dignity for the families and friends of the victims and makes them relive their trauma.

Yours truly
Arlene Found

Friday, May 28th, 2004

To: Sudbury Mayor David Courtemanche
Rick Bartolucci - MNDM, MPP - Sudbury
Members of Sudbury City Council
Coalition to End Violence Against Women
The Sudbury Women's Centre


I strongly believe that the Sudbury Women's Centre is right about this issue -- that the whole community has blinders on here as to the "real" issue behind this debate.

If the Monument were to honour all those who have died from smoking related illnesses, you wouldn't be able to turn around in Sudbury without bumping into a Monument. But, domestic violence -- well, that's just too "uncomfortable" and "shameful" to be in full public display.

One just has to look at the web site dedicated to this very issue to see that there is a problem. Out of 47 pages (8 of which are a survivor's poetry), only two other victims feel secure enough to voice their opinion on this issue. Silence reigns supreme.

Shame is something that survivor's of domestic violence are VERY familiar with. Shame does not feel good. It is easy to see why it would be easier for everyone to just "bury" the issue.

It has been implied that the Sudbury Women's Centre might have their own "agenda" behind all this. And, I believe they do. Their agenda is exposing the shame and truth and honesty behind domestic violence.

The Sudbury Women's Centre should be commended for sticking to their beliefs in the face of so much opposition.

Respectully,

P.M. Russell
Sudbury, Ontario

From the: REXDALE WOMEN'S CENTRE
23 Westmore Drive Suite 400 Etobicoke, ON M9V 3Y7
Tel. 416-745-0062 Fax: 416-745-3995
Email: office@rexdalewome.org

June 9, 2004

Sudbury Mayor David Courtemanche
David.courtemanche@city.greatersudbury.on.ca

Dear Mr. Courtemanche:

I am writing on behalf of the Board of Directors of the Rexdale Women's Centre (RWC) in Toronto, Ontario, in regards to your recent decision to erect a Women's Monument in a Sudbury graveyard.

We understand and commend your decision to honour women with a monument as a testament to their courage in the face of violence perpetrated by their spouses or partners. However, your decision to erect a monument in a graveyard is a chilling reminder to all women of the danger they face when dealing with domestic violence. As you may know, 1 in 4 women will fall victim to some form of violence by their intimate partner or someone they know by the age of 25.Every day, women of all ages and from all backgrounds are beaten or murdered by their partners.

It is shocking that the Greater City of Sudbury Council and its members find it appropriate to honour women who have lost their lives to domestic violence by erecting a monument in a graveyard, instead of having a monument erected in a more suitable venue as a mark of respect to the women who have lost their lives due to domestic violence.

It is our belief that a monument placed in a graveyard is not a reflection of honour or an effective way to educate the community on the issue of women's abuse. Instead, it is an affront to women who are searching to find the courage to leave violent relationships and believe the location of the monument may have a negative effect on their children's lives.

We applaud your initiative, but we stand firmly behind groups like the Sudbury Women's Centre des Femmes and the Disabled Women's Network Ontario who are calling for the placement of the monument in a more visible place, such as in the downtown core or a public park.

We urge you and your council to work with your community to appropriately honour the many women who have died as a result of domestic violence.

Yours truly,

Mrs. Yvonne Thomas
Chairperson, Board of Directors

Cc: (Subbury) Northern Life, lifeedit@northernlife.ca
Sudbury Star, editorial@thesudburystar.com
Coalition to End Violence Against Women's Co-Chair, dawnontario@sympatico.ca
Sudbury Women's Centre des Femmes, swc@isys.ca
Dr. Shafiq Qaadri, MPP Etobicoke North, sqaadri.mpp.co@liberal.ola.org

The last words go to Women Survivors of Violence

May 05, 2004

To the Sudbury Community:

Re: Monument Location at Centre of Controversy

Has anyone - besides the Sudbury Women's Centre - asked victims of domestic violence how THEY might feel about the Monument location? Did I actually say that? How dare I think that our opinions might actually count?

One of the first things that comes to my mind is that we don't really need a Monument to murdered women placed in a cemetery because the bodies of these women are already buried there. I would also have concerns about how the families of these victims might feel about having a Monument placed in a cemetery where their loved one's killer might very well be buried.

The Sudbury Coalition to End Violence Against Women says that with the help of a facilitator, they decided that the cemetery was a fitting place for a memorial symbolizing Respect, Serenity, and Peace. I would like to have those things while I'm still alive. I would hope that such a Monument would be a show of Solidarity, Strength, and Hope for a better future.

The Coalition also says that their group wanted the memorial placed in a park or at the Court house or police station but reckoned that "these women didn't get what they were looking for" at the Court house or police headquarters. And, what would that be? Justice? Dignity? Respect? By placing the Monument in a graveyard, is that saying that they got what they were looking for? I suppose that violence really is completely ended in a cemetery, isn't it?

Was the Sudbury Jail ever considered or were there concerns about offending the prisoners or infringing on some of their many rights? I haven't heard much about vandalism going on at the Court house or Sudbury Jail. It has been quite rampant in cemeteries, though. And, as far as cemeteries becoming "community gathering places" there are a few places that come to my mind where I would rather hang out.

I suppose that nothing is going to change the situation at this point in time but you can be sure that there will be another memorial to honour this cause. Mary Carter said that she hopes it will be the first of several memorials honouring domestic violence victims in Sudbury. As someone who's been there, I hope there will be only one final memorial necessary which would indicate that domestic violence has finally been eradicated in our community.

P. M. Russell
Sudbury, Ontario

May 6, 2004

Dear Rick, David and Gaetane,

I am in disagreement with the placement of the monument in a cemetary location however, I see this a done deal. I say this to you as a survivor and speak from my heart. I was a "near statistic", but fortunately found strength and valuable community resources to help me escape. Seventeen years later, I still live with this threat to some degree.

I feel that the Committee committed an oversight by not hearing from survivors in determining an appropriate location.
Surely an anonymous survivor forum could have been brought together to discuss this issue, to be heard only by Committee members. I have not read anywhere that the Committee engaged in this activity, despite the impressive knowledge and background of its members. I find this incredible given the heightened level of public input and forums at all levels of goverment. Citizen engagements, community forums, focus groups, etc., etc. have become the norm and not the exception.

In closing, I find Sister Mary Carter's viewpoint of young, middle-aged and old, somewhat archaic given our modern, holistic oriented society. As a human being, I want and hope to be respected, find serenity and peace at any and all stages of my life.

Thank you

A Survivor
Name not published to protect privacy of the writer

Poetry by Robin Jones, Survivor

contact us

Return to DAWN Ontario index page

Go To Top

Page last updated June 11, 2004